I haven't posted in a long time.
In that long time, a lot has happened.
Jordan and I are getting a divorce.
There are a lot of issues that are behind it, and the blame rests in both of our hands, so it isn't a one or the others fault. I just want to say that I really really really don't want to divorce him.
I still love him.
Jordan has been a huge part of my life since I was 16, we've been married for four years. I mean of course there have been moments when I've wanted to strangle him, or simply give up altogether, but my love for him has always been the staple of every situation. It didn't matter that he was an ass. I still loved him.
I never thought of the situation where he would not love me anymore.
But that's what happened.
And he wants to get a divorce. I want him to be happy, and if that's not with me, then I will let him go. But it doesn't stop my heart from feeling like it has been shattered.